Things have been so stressful/stupid around my life lately. I'm in the middle of a fight with a friend who is being disrespectful and annoying. It all started with a FaceBook status and is most likely going to end with the death of this friendship.
The status that started it all said (basically) – is a friend really a friend if their SPOUSE doesn’t tag along to friend things? I asked if this was about Sawyer because he doesn’t go along with me to see my friends because they are MY friends and he has some social anxiety. The “friend” texted me back “It wasn’t but it does apply”. So I got into it with him. I’m tired of not fighting stuff like this and being walked on. I tried to explain why Sawyer doesn’t come along and the “friend” won’t understand. He’s being a big old drama queen about it and I’m not done fighting it. I finally said “Can we get together to talk about this before ___’s birthday party?” but now I’m thinking I don’t even want to bother. I know where I stand with him (finally) and I’m actually quite fine with the way things are going. I only want 100% true friends and I’m willing to fight with the ones I have to make sure they’re behind me 100%. I’m probably going to email him today something along the lines of:
What really sucks about all of this is that our “friend” will most likely take his side which will shut me out of her son’s life completely, but, yet again, at least I’ll know where I stand, and I can stop wasting energy with friends that aren’t going to be there when I need them.
I’m at the point in my life where I’m ok with losing the “friends” that I have in order to make new friends that will be there when I need them most. After losing my Dad I’ve learned that it’s important to keep people around you that are important to you, and to respect them, and work for their respect. Friendship is a two way street and I want friends who will meet me in the middle, not ones that will lead me into sketchy neighborhoods I’m not sure I want to be in. (Interesting analogy, no?)
Sawyer keeps telling me “Eff him (the drama queen “friend)”. They do nothing for me but make me feel left out or like I don’t matter. He agrees that only true friends deserve your time. We'll see what comes to pass now that the above email has been sent.
The status that started it all said (basically) – is a friend really a friend if their SPOUSE doesn’t tag along to friend things? I asked if this was about Sawyer because he doesn’t go along with me to see my friends because they are MY friends and he has some social anxiety. The “friend” texted me back “It wasn’t but it does apply”. So I got into it with him. I’m tired of not fighting stuff like this and being walked on. I tried to explain why Sawyer doesn’t come along and the “friend” won’t understand. He’s being a big old drama queen about it and I’m not done fighting it. I finally said “Can we get together to talk about this before ___’s birthday party?” but now I’m thinking I don’t even want to bother. I know where I stand with him (finally) and I’m actually quite fine with the way things are going. I only want 100% true friends and I’m willing to fight with the ones I have to make sure they’re behind me 100%. I’m probably going to email him today something along the lines of:
“I’ve been thinking about it and I’m not sure that we’ll be able to come to an understanding after talking about this. I feel like you’ve made up your mind about why Sawyer doesn’t come along and have become unreasonable about the truth. If you truly believe that my thoughts and feelings are ridiculous, there’s probably no point in meeting to arrive at a conclusion you’ve already apparently arrived at.”
What really sucks about all of this is that our “friend” will most likely take his side which will shut me out of her son’s life completely, but, yet again, at least I’ll know where I stand, and I can stop wasting energy with friends that aren’t going to be there when I need them.
I’m at the point in my life where I’m ok with losing the “friends” that I have in order to make new friends that will be there when I need them most. After losing my Dad I’ve learned that it’s important to keep people around you that are important to you, and to respect them, and work for their respect. Friendship is a two way street and I want friends who will meet me in the middle, not ones that will lead me into sketchy neighborhoods I’m not sure I want to be in. (Interesting analogy, no?)
Sawyer keeps telling me “Eff him (the drama queen “friend)”. They do nothing for me but make me feel left out or like I don’t matter. He agrees that only true friends deserve your time. We'll see what comes to pass now that the above email has been sent.
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